For the first half of this pregnancy I was so sick that I couldn’t even stand to look at a screen. It was akin to a migraine, where I just wanted to lay in the dark, unmoving, and stare at blank walls. Really delightful.
Now that the HG and vertigo have passed but I landed myself on bedrest I have been doing what anyone in my situation would do.
Binge watching Netflix.
Which means that I am now, like the rest of my fellow Americans, utterly fascinated with two things: Making a Murderer and Fixer Upper.
This pregnancy has been full of firsts, like my first time ever reaching the third trimester and also my first time ever seeing Chip and Joanna Gaines in action on account of how I don’t have HGTV.
And now I’m feeling a little bit badly about how I’ve always been real hardcore on the whole “we’re not paying for cable just for ONE channel” thing when it comes to my husband’s love of ESPN. Because I would pay all the monies to watch Chip and Joanna Gaines decorate every house in the world. All the houses. Let those people in the White House, I say. I’m very patriotic like that.
I have so many thoughts while watching this show. Mainly that I want to shiplap everything. And also, where did she get those boots? Those are basically perfect boots.
I spent 24 hours watching all of Season One and group texting my thoughts in real time to my girlfriends. It is a joy to be friends with me and not at all annoying. Here is an example of how not obnoxious it is when you are trying to work and your best friend who is stuck at home on bedrest is spending the whole day texting you about Fixer Upper:
So after that deluge of design I needed a little bit of a palate cleanser and thus, I decided J and I should follow the advice of everyone that we know and watch Making A Murderer.
And then nothing was ever the same again.
We started off strong. It was a Friday night. We watched two episodes.
The following night Scarlette spent the night at her grandparents and we watched four episodes in a row before falling asleep. I woke up to J bringing breakfast to the bed and turning on the next episode.
By Monday morning, I had a new text message obsession. I’m all texting J like “Just read 7 Making a Murderer theories. I sent them to your email. This is the most important work you’ll do all day.”
Followed by: “Also, I need more ice cream. I ate all the rocky road this morning while attempting to not watch episode nine without you. I regret nothing.”
So now I need a new, funny show to binge watch because all the HGTV was irritating me due to the fact that I think it may have triggered my nesting instincts and I’m only allowed out of bed for like, an hour. I can accomplish nothing substantial in an hour. It takes me that long just to braid Scarlette’s hair in the morning. And by “braid” I mean, twist two pieces together and fasten them with a barrette. I can’t braid.
And also because my husband is like “Stop sending me memes of keys next to shoes.”
Any recommendations?
