(Anytime the instructor tells the class something, Scarlette goes “BUT WHY?!” complete with dramatic hand gestures. Also, she is enjoying dressing herself lately. Obviously.)
Lately Scarlette’s phrasing has been what is making me laugh. For example, if I ask her what she wants for breakfast I am met with a variation of these responses:
Scarlette: Mommy, I am still bery hungwy.
KA: Okay, would you like a bagel or some toast?
Scarlette: Well, actuawwy I suppose I would just wike some wittle bit of eggs.
I want goldfish and fwench toast, dat is weally what I NEED for my body.
Well (huge dramatic sigh as though this is a very burdonsome decision) I would just wike some bacon, I guess.
Scarlette: “Mommy, I wuv you”
KA: “Oh thanks honey, I love you too.”
Scarlette: “Yeah. Actuawwy, I don’t wuv you, I wuv whales.”
Anytime I leave to go anywhere, even if I just run to the grocery store for thirty minutes, Scarlette will throw herself at me upon my arrival home and shriek gleefully: MOMMY! YOU CAME BACK FOR ME! I THOUGHT I LOST YOU!”
KA: Can you please hand Mommy those undies?
Scarlette: No! I can’t!
KA: And why not?
Scarlette, holding out Buzz Lightyear undies: Dese not my undies!
KA: Yes they are honey, those are your undies.
Scarlette: NO! NO DEY NOT!
KA: Okay then. So what are those things you are holding?
Scarlette: Dese are my BUZZIES.
Fun facts about Scarlette: She can not be bothered to learn the names of any of the girls in her ballet class. She calls them all “Larry.” To their face. She thinks this is a high compliment since when she is without her beach ball, she refers to herself as “Bob.” This morning she kept going “Come on, Warry! Wet’s go pway ober here!” and the poor confused little girl kept saying “MY NAME NOT LARRY! MY NAME KATIE!”
Scarlette, to a shy little girl at ballet:
“Oh hi Larry! Larry, say hi. LARRY YOU NEEDA SAY HI TO ME!”
(Notices the little girls fingernail polish)
“OH. NICE FINGERS, LARRY! I WEALLY WIKE DOSE FINGERS. YOU STILL NEEDA SAY HI TO ME.”
Scarlette: “Dat’s not da answer! You got say YES to me!”
This morning was senior discount day at the grocery store and as Scarlette walked around in her tutu, she kept pointing to people with white hair and asking loudly “IS DAT MY GWANDMA?” We don’t actually call any of her grandmothers “grandma” and I think that movies have made her very confused about this issue.
We’re watching Finding Nemo. Nemo just got captured and Scarlette jumped up and said “Oh! I coming Nemo! Don’t worry Nemo, I will sabe you!” Then she tried to swan dive off of our couch. I am becoming incredibly adept at catching my kid unexpectedly in mid-air, y’all.
Scarlette, pointing to bathroom rug: “Can I jump on this mud puddle for two minutes?”
I just asked Scarlette what she had in her hand and she said “Ohhhh, don’t you worry about it Mommy.” That response caused me to have the exact opposite reaction, actually. I would have been less worried had she not walked through the house carrying the bathroom plunger only moments before.
KA: Well, let me see what time it is.
Scarlette: I fink it’s pwobably about twenny o’clock
(looks at clock)
Scarlette: Yup! It’s twenny o’clock awright!
(It is 11:32am)
We had to be somewhere early this morning so I loaded Scarlette into the car in her pjs, with her clothes packed to dress her later. When we arrived, she started crying “I CAN’T GO IN DERE! I CAN’T GO IN DERE!” When I asked her what was wrong she said “BECAUSE I NOT WEARING ANY CWOTHES!”
Scarlette: I weally want a meatball (has never, ever had a meatball)
KA: We don’t have any meatballs, honey.
Scarlette: Oh, MAYBE a mousekatool can help you! Eberybody say OOHHH TOODLES!!