I don’t know about y’all but I adore that child.
And in addition to being cute, she’s also hilarious. Here are some of her latest comments and antics for your enjoyment as I drink another cup of coffee to prepare for the level of energy that is going to invade this house when she wakes up.
Scenario: I just gave Scarlette a yellow M&M.
Scarlette: Um, now I want a bwown one!
KA: Well, you only get to have one M&M and you just ate it!
Scarlette: No, Mommy! Da bwown MinAMin ish for my MOUF!
KA: Well, your mouth doesn’t need any more M&Ms right now
*she leaves and comes back a few minutes later carrying a spoon*
Scarlette: Um, okay I weally need a bwown MinAMin for my shpoon.
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Scenario: Scarlette is constantly asking me for a cheeseburger (thank you, Veggie Tales.) Since she can’t tolerate meat or cheese, she’s never actually *had* a cheeseburger.
Scarlette: My name mommy! I da mommy! You da baby!
KA: You’re the mommy! What are you going to do now that you’re the mommy?
Scarlette: I gib you a cheesebuhguh.
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Scenario: I’m working on the computer and Scarlette keeps running in and wiping water all over my arm, shrieking with laughter, and then running off. After a few minutes I think to myself “Self, I did not put water in her paint tray this morning.” Then I am stricken with terror as to what the actual source of the water may be.
KA: Scarlette, where are you getting water? Can you show me where the water is?
*she takes me by the hand and leads me to her potty chair, where apparently she has used it for the first time without needing my help*
Scarlette: I tinkle! I da tinkle water on da Mommy!
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Scenario: I just found Scarlette trying to scale one of the columns on our four poster bed.
KA: Scarlette! What are you doing?
Scarlette: Oh, I jusht werning to cwimb a twee.
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KA: Scarlette it’s time to go night night
Scarlette: OH NO! ISH IT EIGHT FIFTEENSH?
(The thing is, eight fifteen is not even her bedtime. I have no idea why she said that.)
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*We’re currently working on not hitting, a behavior I think we’ve picked up from our friends. And by “we” I mean “Scarlette” on account of how my 30 year old girlfriends and I don’t run around the park swatting at one another while yelling “NO ITSH MY TURN!” So Scarlette raises her hand back to hit me and then lowers it in slow motion til it’s hovering right above my arm and announces solemnly “Mommy. I want to hit you. “
*In a moment of stellar parenting, I decide to introduce Scarlette to Reading Rainbow. Because Lavar Burton! And classic kid show about books! She will love this! *I* will love this! So I use my overly-enthusiastic voice to get her all excited and then after watching it silently with her head cocked to the side and her lips pursed for about five minutes she turns to me, throw up her hands and says “Mommy? Where da wainbows?!”
* On Sunday mornings we typically have cinnamon rolls or donuts as a treat. Only on THIS particular morning, a certain little imp managed to sneak into the dining room, where I found her sitting sweetly at the table, having licked the icing off of every single donut in the box.
*Just discovered that “paper jam” flashing on my computer is actually code for “your toddler stuck three matchbox cars in your printer.”
(I promise my child is well-supervised but you can’t turn your back on her for a second or she’s into mischeief, y’all.)
